observershikou | [Event Post

Current Mood: uncomfortable

[Event Post - Explanations]

*There's a cannibal waiting in the park, for Juudai. He seems to be plucking and tugging at his shirt with a bandaged hand, as though... Uncomfortable in it, looking vaguely ashamed of himself... And slightly embarrassed. And basically looks a bit like he never really got to sleep, isn't that nice?

Also, for you to note, Juudai, when you get there... There's no birds around. No sorts of animal-life. Other than a couple people who are there... It's pretty much silent, the fountain in the middle being the main source of noise.

You are so welcome to notice that and wonder who turned down the volume.*

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

*Juudai's come straight from one of his college classes to meet you, so he's wearing his college uniform. In his hand he has a brown bag with has a few dounts inside, one of which he's eating, he stopped off at Xi's shop on the way out of college XD

He spots Shikou and smiles as he runs up to greet him, but as he gets to him he stops and looks around*

Huh... it's oddly quiet here for an afternoon.

*He then looks at Shikou with a smile*

It's good to see you again Shik-- are you okay?

*Notices Juudai, and smiles slightly, before he asks if he is okay. He... Rubs his head with his good hand, looking ashamed, again.*

A bit more than earlier, but... Not exactly. Just... More thinking about something I did earlier, and wondering what must've been going through my head, when I did it. Because I can't seem to make heads or tails of why...

*He shakes his head, though, smiling a bit again.*

Though, it's good to see you again, too, at least.

Ah, I see!

So what was it that you wanted to talk about?

Oh! *Juudai holds out his bag of donuts, offering one to Shikou*

*... It's sweet. But... He takes one, anyway, nodding in thanks. It might calm him if he eats something. He takes a small bite of it, and... Makes a slight face, but he swallows it all the same. At least it's somewhat jarring.*

Ah... I... Wanted to explain what had happened between me and Noriko, more in-depth... As what had happened sorta... Spans months that most of the world probably don't realize existed, I guess a way would be to put it...

*Pauses.* ... Just... I know how odd this is all going to sound. So please, bear with me on it.

Months that the world probably don't know existed? Hm.

*Juudai sees that there's a bench very close to them, so he sits down on it*

Well, I'm all ears.

*... sits down too, taking another bite. Mrrrgh... He takes a few deep breaths.*

Around... Over two weeks ago, the entire world burnt to ash, as the atmosphere was set aflame. Before that, some people were killed as the result of giant monsters called "Childs" were killed. Maybe around... Four. Five... Even before that, the people who controlled those monsters, were attacked by other monsters, called "Orphans".

And during that, was when Noriko snapped, and was eaten by that monster, Gren Maju Da Eiza.

Does this sound like it'd be unbelievable, yet?

Uh... I don't remember anything like that happening...
Though...considering all the stuff I've been through, I really wouldn't say it was unbelieveable. Or at least to me anyway.

So... it was around that time the whole thing with gren and Noriko started...

*Nods.* It's... All my fault, as well. All because I couldn't show sympathy for her, past my anger. All because I stood by and watched as it ate her... I could have just grabbed her and ran, but...

*He sighs, taking another bite. Grimacing still.* Though, it'd be expected that you wouldn't remember that. No one was supposed to. Not even me, the one who went and instigated it all... Keh, like I'd ever hope for something like that...

See, Juudai, I had gotten into something... Unsatisfactory, quite a long time ago, due to Darkness. Because he basically binded me to a destiny in which I would become a being who'd remake the entire world... No, the entire universe, to my own liking, at the cost of at least twelve different people dying.

Suzume... And Noriko, were both supportive of such a thing. Suzume, because she was tired of what had kept happening, and wanted to be able to live a normal life with me... And Noriko, because she held disgust for the world itself.

Noriko didn't even last. Her haste. Her greed got in the way, and her "Child", the monster she controlled, got killed by someone who wasn't even involved.

*Juudai listens to Shikou, this was all a lot to take in*

...I see. Hm.
Heh, I don't even know what to make of all this, it's kinda strange.

*I bet it is. Being told that this guy tried to remake the universe and then burnt the world is a ton to take in for anyone. He laughs slightly, shaking his head, though... He sorta seems to be crushing the donut he has, despite looking calm.*

Yeah... I guess I would have expected that. It's hard to take in. I didn't want to believe it myself, really, but...

...After the entire world burnt... After everything was gone, after everything was back, and people didn't even know what had occurred... Noriko came to see me. While I was feeding those Needle Worms, on that piece of land that formed on the island, from the volcano erupting.

She... Wasn't happy. She said things about how she had followed me before, just to get the same thing... About how I would have never been trusted with ruling over anything... She was going to kill me, before she got eaten, because of that. Because she planned on backstabbing me, before Adam had decapitated it... About how I never did anything for her. Or how I couldn't even spare any care for her...

She was angry, that I didn't even remember, so... She forced me to remember it. Everything that I did. Including telling the person I cared about most to kill others, for a new world.

*He laughs a bit sarcastically.* It's no wonder she'd h... h... Hate me. I was a horrible monster, compared to even how she is... Just... Horrible.

Hm...

*Juudai lifts his hand up and places it on Shikou's shoulder reassuringly*

I think we all have a little monster inside us all, but... I personally can't hate you or anything for something I don't even remember and didn't know about until now.
Gotta admit, it is a little surprising you'd do such a thing though and have people do that... I never pictured you the type to really do something like that.
But the world and universe is still here, we're still here.

I guess it's pretty much, "what happened has happened".

So Noriko was angry at you because she felt you didn't care about her?

*... Taken a bit aback by the fact that Juudai would even be touching him. He doesn't expect comfort, at this point. But he stops crushing the poor baked goods at least.*

Not because I didn't care about her. But because I treated her like nothing. Something that was worthless, after the use was spent... Even though I had tried to speak to her, after I had managed to calm myself... All she could see me as was a monster. A horrible creature.

And after she... How do I put this... Basically switched ourselves, I got why she'd think that... Including with the fact that I didn't even step in to save her, when Gren Maju Da Eiza went after her.

*Juudai removes his hand from Shikou's shoulder and resumes listening to him*

I see...

*Rubs his shoulder, where Juudai had touched him. He actually seems vaguely... Thankful about that.*

... I really never meant to treat her like that... Frankly, every memory she forced into my head... Every action she took as she took my form, and acted like me... It was all foreign. I couldn't understand the logic behind it. I couldn't understand why I'd even act like it...

It was like that wasn't even me... *shakes his head slightly.*

I keep getting off-tangent about this stuff... Sorry, Juudai. This is probably a lot to have to hear.

It's okay.

I guess all kinds of things can influence how you think. Hell, I guess in one way I've done that myself... not acted like myself and hurt people, but it's not something I'd do now, it was the influence of my powers. Just like how you acted, well... must of been an influence from what you were going through at the time.
You wouldn't do anything like that now.

... Yeah... I guess I wouldn't.

But it doesn't fix the fact that I'm still a monster... Even I see myself as that, without Noriko's... Help, I guess it would be... *He looks at the broken apart donut in his hand, and sighs, eating a bit more of it. Coughs lightly after swallowing.*

Keh... I even hurt the people I go and care about... All because they had instigated it first, doesn't mean that I should have hurt them, like that... *Mutters.* I hope they're at least alright... Their wrists probably hurt, by the end of that... But with what they were trying to do...

"Their wrists probably hurt...?" Who are you talking about?

Shiyoko... Shiroko... I think it might have been more Shiyoko, but...

I found them last night, while I was walking around... *He closes his eyes, shaking his head. As though trying to shake off something.*

She... Didn't recognize me. Said that she had dropped out of school years ago, despite having only been there last week... That all she was, was some prostitute. Wouldn't even give a name. Becoming violent even after I pointed out that her smoking was unhealthy, before everything else...

*He curls up slightly onto the bench, looking relatively... Hurt, actually.* But it was them. It's not easy to hide certain... Things from me. Scents. Sounds. It all matched to her... But why she'd suddenly go and act like that...?

...maybe somebody made her think that way. Messed around with her memories, something like that.

... Maybe... I really hope not, though. I really... Really hope not. To think that someone might have messed with her like that...

It'd be horrible, really, to think that someone like them would be messed with again, so soon...

The only thing I can think that would of done that, is Noriko and Gren...
...or... the creature hidden behind them...
...though it could be something completely different, there's no way to really know for sure.

But they've proved more than once, that they can change personalities and memories to their will.

*Nods slightly, looking morose. A small bird flutters over, it obviously either brave or a fool, making probably the only sound that has been heard, other than the talking and the fountain, itself. Shikou stares at the bird, watching it.*

... Though why they'd even do that... I wouldn't know. Noriko had already possessed Shiyoko, before... And caused Shiroko so much distress... Why deal with them, again, especially after she finally managed to get a grip back onto her existence...? Just to make them hurt again?

*Juudai follows his gaze towards the bird*

I really don't know... but she's gone after Isabel and done things to her numerous times ... but the most recent we believe was done by this creature that lurks behind them.
So... I'm a little worried that same creature might be the reason Shiyoko is acting the way you described...

I really can't be sure.

... I don't think anyone can really be... "Sure"... Though... What if it's just another personality, that formed? I know that at least two others have, besides them... Though why they'd make a personality like that...

*The bird flutters a bit closer over to them. Shikou's good hand sorta... Twitches, as though in anticipation.*

*Juudai doesn't notice the twitch, he's watching the bird*

That's true... it really could just be that...
...I really hope there's a way to get her out of it though. It's not safe for her.

... It isn't. Frankly, I shouldn't have even walked away, when she told me to. I should have brought her somewhere safe, until I could have found some way to help... Help her... To...

*The bird gets closer as he talks, within arm's reach of Shikou... At which then he suddenly lashes out at it, as though to grab it, much effectively scaring it away... And making him lose his balance on the bench, falling over himself. He mutters a few words of pain, as the couple other people who are in the park stare at him, for doing that.*

Usually tend to have better control over that, that lucky little...

Shikou!

*Juudai kneels down to help him up, as he looks at Shikou, he looks concerned*

*Gets helped up, though he seems rather... Awkward. His hand is still twitching, and he keeps staring at the spot that the bird used to be in.*

... Ah... Thanks, Juudai. For the help.

No problem.

*Juudai looks down and notices that Shikou's hand is twitching*

Shikou...

*... looks down at his hand, and then grabs it with the bandaged one, trying to make it stop. He looks ashamed of himself, again.*

It's getting harder to control that... Though I guess it'd make sense. Big city. So many people. Been quite a while, since the last session... I liked it better on the island. The clean air. The forest... I had a much easier time, ironically, staying under control there, despite all of that...

... Maybe I should go, before I do something else I end up regretting.

*As he talks, Juudai puts a hand on his shoulder again*

It might be for the best, yeah.

I really hope you're all allowed back to the Academy soon.

But until then, hang in there, I know you can.

*Nods slightly.* Yeah... I can. Just... Need to find a better way to control myself, over this... I can't let certain people notice, or...

*He backs away slightly from Juudai.* Sorry that I told you so much... To place any sort of burden onto you... Please forgive me, if you can. *He bows, and then turns, leaving. Quickly.*

I... *Wow he moves fast, so Juudai just watches him make a quick exit*

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[Event Post - Explanations]

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject